Crazy
by ColdFusion180
Summary: Pyro reflects on what other people think of him as while highlighting one of his most well known attibutes.


**Crazy**

"Never has anyone had the vision or imagination to attempt what we are about to do!" Pyro strode in front of his assembled audience while speaking with extreme passion. "It is not just the thrill of it all. It is the chance to go and experience something no one has ever done before!"

"Enough!" Remy shouted from where he sat on the recreation room couch. Piotr was seated next to him. "Pyro, this is the weirdest, most insane plan you have ever come up with!"

"No kidding," Sabertooth snapped standing off to the side. "I don't know what's more pathetic. The possibility that the Firebug actually believes any of this could work or the fact we just spent the last twenty minutes listening to him ramble on about it."

"But it'll be fun! We just need to have the resources and desire to do it!" Pyro argued zealously.

"Pyro, there is no way you can personally fly several hundred **tons** of cream, sugar and natural flavors into a thick cloud bank, mix it all together and have it end up snowing ice cream and sorbet," Remy pointed out. "And even if there was you'd never convince any of us to help you attempt it!"

"But it's scientifically possible! The evidence is all around us!" Pyro turned toward Piotr. "Think about it! Clouds are huge collections of frozen water crystals, right? Just a bunch of teeny, tiny ice shards suspended thousands of feet in the air?"

"Well, yes," Piotr admitted hesitantly.

"See! They are no different than piles of shaved ice lying right in a plastic bowl! Everything is just more spread out up there! And they provide all natural refrigeration!" Pyro crowned triumphantly. "Therefore it must be possible to disperse a bunch of similarly spread out ingredients into a cloud, mix them all together and have them fall down to Earth as frozen treats! We'll make history!"

"Forget it! This is one of the stupidest things I've heard," Sabertooth growled. "I'm not gonna waste my time listening to this garbage anymore!"

"For once I agree with you," Remy got up. "Let me know when you finally get tired of this little fantasy of yours."

"But…but what about the ice cream?" Pyro asked desperately.

"Make some raspberry chiffon and we'll have it for dessert," Remy quipped as he headed out of the room. "Should be easy since you already have ice shards on the brain."

"More like has an ice shard for a brain," Sabertooth sneered following him out.

"I tell you Pyro gets nuttier every day," Remy muttered as he left.

"He's more than nuts! He's one hundred percent, certifiably crazy!" Sabertooth growled.

Piotr got up from the couch and gave Pyro a sympathetic look. "Do not pay attention to them. They do not really mean any of that. I will go talk to them."

"Yeah, okay," Pyro scuffled his foot and looked up at him. "You believe my plan could work, don't ya Colossus?"

"Um…well…anything is possible," Piotr looked away uncomfortably. "Excuse me." He turned and headed for their departed teammates.

"Oh bugger," Pyro sighed and started to make his way toward his room. "No one ever takes me seriously. Just because I think big doesn't mean they have to shoot down my ideas. It would have been a lot of fun."

Pyro reached his room and closed the door with a sigh. He stood in quiet thought for a moment. "Well, who needs those blokes? Calling me nuts and everything." He got a distant look in his eye. "_Give me a place where I can play. And be myself day after day. That kind of life is where I want to stay._"

He spotted his stuffed platypus sitting on his bed and gave a small smile. "_They say I'm…crazy!__ Just a little bit out of whack! 'Cause I always wanna act my dreams out! They call me a maniac!_"

"_Well if I'm crazy what a wonderful way to be!_" Pyro scooped up his stuffed platypus and waltzed into the middle of the room. "_Imagine all the possibilities if the whole world was just like me! Oooh! Oooh! Oooh!_"

"_Crazy! Crazy! Everyone thinks I'm crazy!_" Pyro twirled around with his platypus. "_But I've got a feeling deep inside! They'd all like to be just like me!_"

"_Crazy! Crazy!_" Pyro sang out with the stuffed animal clutched to his chest. "_Crazy! Crazy! Crazy! Crazy! Crazy! Once in a while, I set myself free! Who needs reality?_"

Pyro paused dramatically for a moment. "_They say I'm crazy! A study in imperfection!_" He began dancing again. "_But I'm just trying to find a little affection!_" He brought his platypus up to his face. "_Wouldn't you like that too?_"

"_People say I'm crazy 'cause I do the first thing on my mind!_" Pyro laughed happily. "_I guess freedom is a serious crime these days!_ _Well lock the door and then, throw away the key! I think being crazy's best for me!_" Pyro continued to laugh and dance around the room with his platypus.

Meanwhile, Piotr was slowly herding Remy and Sabertooth down the hallway. "You're not really gonna make us do this are you?" Remy asked.

"Yes I am," Piotr said forcefully. "You two really hurt Pyro with you thoughtless comments about him. He seemed very depressed."

"Oh come on, it's not like he hasn't been called names before," Sabertooth scoffed. "He'll get over it."

"It was still very rude and he deserves an apology," Piotr pointed out as they reached Pyro's room. "It is only polite to treat each other with a certain level of decency and respect."

"Yeah, I suppose you're right," Remy sighed and opened the door. "Hey, Pyro I…what the heck?"

"_Ya ma da! La da dee da dee da la da!_" Pyro sang happily with his back toward the door, his platypus held lovingly in his arms as he danced totally oblivious to everything. "_La da dee dum! La da da! La da da da! __La da da!_"

The three Acolytes watched the spectacle for a while before slowly closing the door. "Guess we won't have a chance to apologize for a while," Remy blinked.

"Okay, maybe he is not as depressed as I thought," Piotr admitted.

"I said it once and I'll say it again," Sabertooth grunted. "That boy is absolutely crazy!"

* * *

**Disclaimer: ****I do not own X-Men: Evolution or the song "Crazy" originally performed by Gene Wilder.**


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